Poo Ping Chinese Restaurant
| Name: | Poo Ping Chinese Restaurant |
|---|---|
| Address: | (Needs street address) New Auburn, New Jersey |
| Founded: | Original: 1st July 1997 Current: 6th February 2027 |
Poo Ping Chinese Restaurant is the local Chinese restaurant of New Auburn. It is run by the Chiang family, and serves the general New Auburn area with classic "American Chinese" dishes.
The restaurant's main selling point by far is its name. People from all over south Jersey visit New Auburn just to see the mythical "Poo Ping Chinese Restaurnt" in person. However, whether or not the name actually increases business is debateable.
History
Poo Ping Chinese was created by Taiwanese immigrant Andrew Chiang on 1st July 1997, coincidentally the day the UK returned Hong Kong to China. It was built out of a long abandoned shoe store, and started off as a generic American Chinese restaurant called "Golden House". Through-out the next 28 years, Golden House enjoyed moderate success in New Auburn, supplying the townsfolk with the obligatory "Chinese takeout" that all American towns are required by law to have.
Starting with covid quarantine, the restaurant sadly fell on hard times, suffering repeated bouts of low activity and anti Chinese racism, made worse by the fact the Chiangs are Taiwanese and are very vocally anti CCP. The original restaurant had to shut down on 29th August 2025 after Andrew Chiang fell behind on debt payments, and he had to cut his losses before they got really bad. The restaurant would sit empty for a year and a half.
The Chiang's luck would turn around though, as with David Edwards getting prepared to eventually take on the reigns of Edwards Investments, he was given a practice run investment and decided to assist the Chiangs in re-opening the restaurant. However, David, being David, decided to add an optional condition to the investment that stated that Edwards Investments will relinquish all ownership of the store once the invested money is earned back, only if the store is renamed "Poo Ping". Andrew Chiang agreed only because he wanted to have 100% control of his restaurant whenever possible, and because David literally was begging on one knee to call the restaurant "Poo Ping" because he thought it was funny.
Trivia
- David Edwards first saw an image of a "Poo Ping Chinese Restaurant" on some unknown meme site when he was 10. As is expected, David never let it go.
- The Chinese text on the building says "大衛愛德華茲是個混蛋", which is very roughly translated as "David Edwards is a douche". This might have also been David's idea as well, but it's unconfirmed.
- The restaurant's food is commonly known to make people constipated, though no direct cause was ever identified.